Wednesday, September 2, 2009

Inadequacy

I feel like I have it pretty good when it comes to my job. If we could just erase the hour drive there and back, I think I would actually consider this THE perfect job. I only work 4 days a week, get a decent paycheck, and have a generous amount of autonomy. The practice is small (but growing, growing) and it's so nice working in a Christian environment. I love that I am allowed to share life experiences with a number of people on a daily basis. I am so thankful that God chose this path for my career (at least for the time being) and I know this is what I enjoy doing. BUUUUTTTTTTT... even when you know you're in the right place, do you ever feel like you're just not good enough? Maybe I'm just having a slump this week or something, but it just feels like every procedure I've done, along with a few negative/rude patients and a little extra criticism from the boss is just a little too much for one week? And this has only been a 3-day work week might I add. I understand that I'm still really new at all this, but sometimes it just feels like you can't do anything right. Does anyone else ever feel like this? I'm trying to not get discouraged and I'm sure it's just a nice little attack from Satan, but all I really want to do is provide excellent healthcare to women. I want to be GOOD at what I do. Is it too much to pray for God to sharpen my gynecological/obstetrical skills:-)

Can I add that I CANNOT wait for the TN10 Vacation tomorrow??? Here we come Florida!

2 comments:

Garry said...

Shawn - Try to stay upbeat and positive. At times the seemingly onslaught of our glaring shortcomings and weakness can overwhelm us - just remember that God loves us as we are not as we will be -

Garry

ALM said...

Hey Shawn. I think the feelings of being inadequate and overwhelmed are completely normal in ANY new job. We all can relate to this - I felt this way when I first start teaching and then being a new mommy! Remember, you've worked hard to be where you're at. It sounds like the Lord gave you a heart for what you're doing. He's equipped you with everything you need. You're beyond qualified! Believe in yourself. I bet you're doing a great job!!